05 April 2011

i'm currently letting annie cry in her swing because she seems like she just needs to get it all out before she can fall asleep.

interesting.  like mother, like daughter.

...and she's out.  she might be addicted to the swing.  whatever.. it's keeping me sane right now.  and before you read this, you should know that i'm currently obsessed with my new app instagram.  love it more than most things.
first things first, i chopped 6 inches off of my hair:


it was liberating and i needed a change.  you know when you get your hair done and then you rush home to fix it yourself because the way you fix it is the way you really love it?  well, it was the opposite this day.  i loved how it was styled the day it was done and i can't seem to get it the same.  mother goose.  either way, i'm glad it's gone.


next, the move.  husband got a new job that we're thrilled about and it's eventually relocating us to san francisco.  we aren't going to end up in san fran until september after his training, but the training is long and is located in a few different places throughout the summer.  this means that i'm moving to GA with the girls to live with my parents for 4 months and then we'll rendezvous in august and make the big move.  he reports to training in a few weeks... which means we are packing up like crazy people and trying really hard not to lose our minds.  jake is pretty solid and calm, i am not.  without getting into it because honestly it makes me really sad, i'm going to miss him terribly during the summer.  we'll see him every once in awhile but man i'll be happy when september comes.

because of the move, this is the constant state of my living room:


and the current state of my eldest daughter:


except that's kind of a lie because these photos were taken last week.  since then, little goldie has taken a turn for the worse and has some crazy viral infection that includes a horrible cough that made her throw up tonight and eye boogers and yellow snot.  she hasn't felt well at all and is upstairs coughing in her crib as we speak.  it's literally breaking my heart.

exhibit a:




is she not the sweetest little person?  through it all, she still smiles and spins when "head, shoulders, knees and toes" comes on.  she still loves her ba-ba and her sissy and her da-da.  and she's been extra cuddly with me in particular which i'm secretly loving.  i really hope she gets better soon.  poor thing.

and then there is annie girl.  she is so sweet, we just love her.  most of our nights start out like this:


but we get through the fuss and she falls asleep nicely.  it just always happens at 1 am.  i need to work on that...

annie is yummy to me these days.  i mean she always has been since the moment i laid eyes on her, but recently i've fallen in love with this baby all over again.  i could kiss her all day.

exhibit b:



to be honest, i'm not doing FABULOUS.  life is pretty stressful with all the changes, sicknesses (did i mention i basically have the same thing goldie does?  my friend ani said it best:  moms should not be allowed to get sick.  amen)... i mean, it's just a lot to handle.  and a lot of the times i don't handle it very well because i'm sleep deprived and feeling so many emotions that i just don't even know what to do with myself.

but then i get looks like this:


...and i'm reminded that life will be okay.  i will survive.  i'll get out of this funk/depression/overwhelmed existance and i'll get back to being me.  i won't always cry at the drop of a hat or when my daughters are both crying at the same time or when it's 1 am and i'm still awake.  it won't always be this way.  but i'm working really hard on just enjoying these moments that are kind of making me crazy.  who knows, maybe i'll miss it one day.  but maybe not.

tomorrow is this guys birthday:


hot.  love jake so much.  happy birthday to my best friend.

goodnight.

11 comments:

holtkamp said...

i love your new hair! (and your old hair :) i know what you mean about feeling refreshed with a new change of hairstyle. your growing family is so adorable. i love all the everyday snapshots you take of your girls and life in general. best wishes on your move! thinking positive thoughts for you! -jen

Ali said...

hang in there jenna! I told myself many a late night with Brynn "this is the refiners fire. this is the refiners fire." and it's true. No wonder mom's love their kids so much - we give EVERYTHING to them (including our sanity at times!) :) You look great, love the hair cut. Annie is so dang cute. I'm excited for you guys in these next few months!

Andrea said...

amen amen amen.
just know u are NOT alone in your feelings. i love reading your posts bc it makes me realize i am NOT crazy and other moms feel like me sometimes too. :)

Congrats to Jake on the new job! San Fran is such a fun place! What will he be doing? I'm glad u will be able to be with you parents during the time he is gone. What a big help that will be!

Andrea said...

Oh and PS the black plague has been at our house too the past 2 weeks. Similar symptoms. The babies have little coughs right now and it's horrid!!!
Did Annie stay clear?

Jessica said...

you're a good mommy and wife

Jamie said...

It seems like you and Andrea are living parallel lives these days. It sounds like a crazy whirlwind and it's a good thing you are a strong woman. Please email me with any San Fran questions (sorry I got your FB message so late.) jamie dot a dot cook at gmail.

P.S. Your girls are darling and their mom is beautiful, too.

Jodi Pitchforth said...

wow four months! tyler and i will be separated for six weeks (like we did last year) and i am dreading it! you'll get through it though. your girls are so adorable.

jenn said...

you are doing GREAT! both your girls are beautiful....
happy birthday jake!
COME ON SEPTEMBER!!!! although, it will prob be REALLY nice being with your mom for a few months to help you out! (physically and emotionally! nothing like a mom's love!!!!!!!)

AaReAn said...

1. i feel like everyone is moving to san fran...my sister lives there too. you guys should be friends!
2. your babies are so so so cute!
3. happy bday jake!
4. Sage was addicted to her swing for the first four months of her life. Its totally fine!!!!!!
5. One of my friends said the best thing about motherhood....and that is "it came to pass...it didn't come to stay" well said. very well said.

AaReAn said...

and when I say "it didn't come to stay" she meant the things that happen...like poopy diapers...1 AM feedings...tantrums. You know that sort of thing. :-)

Michelle said...

hey lady, those are seriously some of the cutest pictures ever. Right now they say "I love you mommy" with their sweet little faces....that's truly how we know that it's all worth. they're the two luckiest little sisters in the world to have you and to have each other