07 September 2011

i wasn't going to post this but...

sometimes i wonder what goldie is thinking.  she'll be doing one thing one minute and then she totally switches her thoughts and is obsessed with something else the next. then all of a sudden she stops dead in her tracks, looks at me with those big brown eyes and exclaims at the top of her lungs, "air-pane! sky! grass!"  this means, "i hear an airplane in the sky and i want to go play in the grass."  i always wonder with that crazy horse. then my friend emailed me this delicious bite of humor on a day that i needed a good laugh.  i've hesitated with posting it because there's some language, and my grandpa reads my blog (love you grandpa!).... anyway, i've edited a few words but i left in the good stuff. it's just too hilarious to NOT post it.  so kick back, grab your kids' latest carb addiction, and enjoy this one on me. 

Day 215: Approximately 3 Minutes Inside The Head of My 2 Year Old

 
















by Jason Good on August 7, 2011 

Each of these “emotions” lasts about 3 seconds.
  1. I wanna play with Daddy’s phone.
  2. I wanna put on Mommy’s shoes.
  3. GET MOMMY’S SHOES OFF MY FEET NOW!
  4. I wanna open and close the thermostat.
  5. I wanna turn on and off the light on the microwave.
  6. Is there anyone here with a phone I haven’t played with yet?
  7. I NEED TO PUSH SOME ***DAMN BUTTONS.
  8. I wanna pick up the cat by it’s head.
  9. I wanna throw all the toothbrushes in the sink.
  10. HOLY SH*T I’M STARVING.
  11. CHEDDAR BUNNIES.
  12. I HATE FRUIT.
  13. I want out of my chair.
  14. I wanna play with the iPad.
  15. I wanna go outside. No, I wanna turn the heat on.
  16. I wanna take my pants off.
  17. I don’t like the shirt I’m wearing.
  18. I wanna play with Mommy’s phone.
  19. I NEED TO PUSH MORE BUTTONS NOW.
  20. I’m thirsty.
  21. No, not for that.
  22. Yes, perfect, juicebox. I’m gonna squeeze this damn thing all over myself.
  23. Where’s Daddy?
  24. Where’s the cat?
  25. Where’s Mommy?.
  26. SERIOUSLY WHERE’S MOMMY!?
  27. Oh my God I think Mommy left forever.
  28. Ok, there’s mommy. I want to play with her phone
  29. Hungry again. Never mind
  30. I just remembered not liking these pants. Get them off.
  31. STOP TAKING OFF MY PANTS!
  32. Wow, I’m starving. I want peas but I don’t know how to tell anyone.
  33. Finally, peas. I like throwing these.
  34. WHY DO I STILL HAVE THESE PANTS ON?
  35. Oh look, a new person. I wonder if they have a phone.
  36. Im tired.
  37. IM NOT TIRED!
  38. I wanna go for a walk but I don’t wanna go outside.
  39. No, not inside either!
  40. I need to push some buttons right now.
  41. I hate this diaper.
  42. My eyes itch.
  43. WOW! Is this my toe?
  44. STOP TRYING TO TAKE MY PANTS OFF!
  45. I hate these pants.
  46. This shirt itches.
  47. I’m tired.
  48. Stop asking me if I’m tired.
  49. Where’s that toy that goes beep.
  50. I wanna take a bath in my clothes.
  51. Put on my favorite song.
  52. Where’s the cat?
  53. What is UP with my shirt?
  54. Did I just hear a dog bark?
  55. YOU DID NOT JUST TRY TO TAKE OFF MY SHIRT AGAIN!
  56. I wanna see a dog.
  57. No, not OUTSIDE! I wanna see a dog inside.
  58. Is my penis still there? Good.
  59. I peed.
  60. I’m bored.


Repeat.



original post found here.

3 comments:

Kenzie said...

Ah ha ha ha... I've got one if those too. Mind if I re post this?

jenn said...

hilARIOUS!

Rachel said...

totally re-posted this on my blog. hilarious!